I think there is something sad about the malays.
We profess to be devout muslims but our actions indicates the opposite.
Long before the ramadhan is over ...ermm..long before ramadhan even started (for that matter), we were already preparing for Hari Raya.
There is nothing wrong with celebrating our success of over coming an extremely difficult test; that is the 30 days fast during Eid, or Hari Raya. But one day is enough laaaaa....
“Allah said, ‘All the deeds of the son of Adam are for him: the good deeds will be multiplied ten times to seven hundred time, except fasting, which is for Me and I will reward for it accordingly. He abandons his (sexual) desire, food and drink for Me.’ Verily, there are two joyous and pleasurable moments for the fasting person: one at the time of breaking his fast, and the other is when he will meet his Lord (in the Hereafter). Verily, the unpleasant odor emanating from the mouth of the fasting person is better in the sight of Allah than the scent of musk.”
[Al-Bukhari & Muslim].
One have to admit that fasting is not easy. And there is really no point prolonging the pain if one is not sincere. Whereas all the other acts of worship can be under false pretenses and the need to show off one's devoutness (is there such a word?), fasting is something else. Without sincerity it is not something you can successfully complete over such a prolonged period.
Unlike all the other fasts, the Ramadhan fast is total abstinence from food, drinks and sex in the day time. And that can be a tall order, believe you me.
Also as stated in the above quoted hadith, the joy is two fold. One is the happiness one feels at the break of fast;(read: when one gorges oneself silly after 14 hours of hunger), the other is when he meets his Lord.
And I have to add another; when we celebrate the Eid. Obviously from the Hadith, we can see that Allah had not put much emphasise on the Eid celebration. But why oh why, do we malays?
In the malay world 30 days of fasting should be rewarded with 30 days of gorging oneself to death; or so we behave.
In my eyes, it just makes a mockery of the ramadhan fasting (feels like deja vu, like I've used this line before in this blog).
For the malays the preparation for Eid surpasses any other; short of a wedding. Women would deprive themselves of sleep just to get the goodies ready for Raya.(one will have no idea how painful it is to be deprived of sleep, first when for a during the month one will be up and about at O dark ugly hours and then towards the end of ramadhan when the women folks especially will be putting in the extra hours to make kueh raya and to make preparation to celebrate Raya) Months before Raya, one would already make bee lines to the tailor to make sure that the baju raya will be ready in time. Just for that one day of Raya...
Thus why I suppose the ends justifies the means. After all the effort, why celebrate for one day only ...make it 30 days of celebration for 30 days of pain. That would be more worth the while. In the words of the malays, baru lah berbaloi!
Personally I am not too keen about open houses - going to or giving one. In the olden days (this makes me feel ancient) the malays would visit one another as a way to maintain cordial relationships among brethens (all muslims are brethens to begin with, you see). You do not need to wait for an 'open house' invitation to visit one another. Just go. We never expect a feast from the host and if food is offered, well and good; otherwise we are here to enquire on the health and to catch up with news on the host and their family members. All in the name of continued relationship and goodwill.
If i feel so inclined to feed my friends, I would prefer to invite a few close ones or old ones; cook up a storm and then settle down for at least 12 hours catching up with one another. Real solid relationship building.
There is no real reason to be inviting half the region, half of which are total strangers and when you do see a friend in the crowd, they will be so far away in the crowd that all you can do is wave and silently mouth "i'll be with you in a mo .." and that 'Mo' will be 3 years later when you bump into them at Tesco while selecting vegetables at the market section. Really, there is no serious relationship building during mass open houses. All one will manage to achieve is to feed a bunch of ungrateful greedy SOBs; who have no qualms about bad mouthing your do, if they find something lacking....and believe me, much could be lacking in a catered event.
That said, on the flip side; I suppose open houses are great events to be held by ministers and the governments as it does foster unity amongst the great unwashed masses. If we have little else in common, at worst we can do is we have that common greed and the kiasu-ness to grab what ever food on the buffet so that the cat in the line behind us will not get any. And then, that cat will rally up with the other cats behind him, regardless of race; 'tut tut' at how uncivilised and greedy the cat infront is being and that is how you foster unity. It cost the government next to nothing. How much can food cost anyways, as long it is not catered by MAS...
But I digress...
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